My daughter, a pain in the butt.

My butt hurts.

Like really I have a pulled muscle in my left butt cheek. It is from spinning.

I'm sick, with the flu, and when that starts I get insane like I'm going to work out like an idiot and sweat out the the illness. I don't even know if I'm working out harder, I know I'm sweating profusely but that could be from a fever. I could be delirious thinking I'm Lance freaking Armstrong on a spin bike while in reality I barely turn over the pedals. But my body hurts so yeah, I probably over did it a little.

It doesn't help, I'm still sick. If you were in class with me you are probably are starting to feel a little scratch in the back of your throat. It's hot, we were breathing hard, you know it's just a germ's incubating dream.

My nose hurts now too from too much blowing and I'm miserable

My poor little girl found my last little nerve as we walked through the grocery store and she jumped all over it, again and again and again. I positioned her. You know what I mean, I kind of put her in a spot, not roughly, but I was done using my words because they weren't connecting. And the kid, who has never been hit ever, well not by me, I'm not vouching for kids on the play ground, she said, "Don't punch me!"

What?

I looked around frightened someone might have thought me an abuser, we were alone, I then was aghast. "Who punches you?"

"You do."

"You are out of your freaking mind."

I don't hit her but I will call her a liar or apparently tell her she's crazy. I do threaten to beat her, which isn't funny if you've ever been beaten but she typically counters with, "Why would you want to hurt my body?"

Answering, "to make you listen to me" or "to teach you a lesson" just doesn't roll off the tongue when you've just been reminded that hitting someone actually hurts their body. So that just ends the mess.

All of this is just weighing on me. Being sick, having a literal pain in the ass and the girl-child claiming abuse at my hands, oh and a paper that feels awkward due tomorrow, on a day I just want to do other things.

Well one other thing.

I found a position I want to apply for. It's going to take some in depth research. I'm capable of doing the job, but I've got to get up to speed on the agency's mission, history, board of directors, etc. You know stuff to be jazzed (how's that for some old school lingo) about. I expect I need to spend a solid 8-10 hours learning. And that stokes my fire, well normally it would but I want to nap. Really I want 9pm to arrive so I can go to bed.

Oh and the position, which I don't want to talk about too much for putting a whammy on it, is a Directorship which is quite a jump from Lunch Lady. I'm confident, but there are some fears of being an impostor. I know I'm dismissing all the transformations and not looking at the updated version, Julianna 4.0. It's fine I'll muster through it. Just now, I'm not feeling wonderful.